What it is.

I've been feeling quite paranoid lately. Everything makes me super anxious or worried, and I don't quite understand it. I also made the mistake of stepping on a scale a week ago and now all I can concentrate on is the fact that I've gained fifteen pounds. I don't have the control to not eat anymore like I used to, which is good, but still makes me panic.

I'm also just worried about everything. I have no realistic goals for my future. I want to act and/or write and make my way that way, but that's nearly impossible. I don't understand.

I don't know what it is, what's wrong with me anymore... I can't figure anything out. I feel lost. I have these weird twisted thoughts. My spending is out of control again and I don't even know how I'm spending all that money. My parents are taking over my bank account again. So that's awful.

Ugh.