There is nothing worse than the shame and guilt one feels after engaging in behaviors. Last night at work, I slipped again and I just felt so humiliated, like everyone knew and could tell. I couldn't believe myself for letting myself fall so much.
Today is a rough day. I'm feeling huge; I am huge. It's really difficult to fight this feeling as I'm struggling to eat a banana. I'm mostly in mourning of the loss of my good physique, and praying I'll get the energy to get it back. I just need a lot of motivation.
On the plus side, I'm getting my hair done in a week and a half. I'm switching hairdressers and I have a cute haircut picked out.
I'm still so ashamed. It's time to make yet another fresh start.
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